Ben Jack comments

Ben Jack

I love those adverts on TV that ask us the question "have you been in an accident at home or work that wasn't your fault?" We always get some sort of true-life tale of how someone fell from a ladder at work, or someone who was run over by a fork lift truck, or something equally unfortunate (doubly unfortunate if you fall off the ladder into the path of an oncoming fork lift truck). The adverts go on to inform us that we could get compensation for our troubles, because, after all, where there's blame, there's a claim!

Such adverts are a sad reflection of a culture that always looks to place the blame somewhere (it wasn't me!). How many times have we seen incidents recently in the media where someone's head must roll for their involvement in a mistake, or scandal? The real problem with a blame and claim culture, though, is that more often than not we look to place responsibility anywhere except 'me'. The reality of that attitude is a society that merely shakes its head and points its finger.

Imagine that you told your best friend not to jump into a swimming pool because they couldn't swim, but they did it anyway (sounds like something one of my friends would do). Sure, you'd be mad at them for not listening to you, so pointing the finger and shaking your head would convey that emotion to them, but it's not going to stop them from drowning.

Do you think God ever, for a moment, thinks this world would be better without the people? I urge you to read the Bible's account of Jesus' life, death and resurrection. Be it your first time of reading, or one hundredth, know that those are not the actions of a God who points the finger and watches, but of a God who dives in the deep end to show us how, and make it possible for us to swim. Not only that, but God made us all to swim in our own style (I'm a front stroke man myself; butterfly is surely for show offs).

I recently heard someone make the beautifully-and intentionally-ironic statement:

"Church would be great without the people!"

It can certainly feel that way, sometimes. The problem with people is, we complicate things with our feelings and emotions, our individuality and conformity. We make group situations difficult by having a voice, or not having one. We step on each other's toes with our preferences, likes and dislikes. We complicate community with the 'me' attitude. Sorry folks, but that's just the way it is. Community, and therefore church, is people, and people are...well...complicated.

It saddens me greatly to think on the many church and community situations I am aware of that have been broken or damaged by the 'blame and claim' culture. It saddens me even more when I think on the times when I have been guilty of such an attitude. So many of these problems are often less about 'wrongs' and more about 'likes'. So often we allow ourselves to be offended by people and situations that are not about 'me', or for 'me', and yet we are so good at making ourselves the focus. When we choose to take offence, the knock-on effect is that we must place blame somewhere (anywhere except numero-uno). We seek to take (claim) from someone at a time when we should give. Just as God could have claimed from us for our wrongs and offenses, and yet instead gave us Jesus. The society-driven mix-up of claiming instead of giving is the cause of so many of our problems.

It is important for me to point out that I am not suggesting we let true wrongs go by without consequence. Far from it. Community cannot work in such a way. But, instead of looking to place blame, let us look at our own responsibilities-to ourselves, each other, and, ultimately, to God. What are our expectations of each other? I may never set out to let anyone down, but in my human existence it is almost inevitable that I will. That is no excuse for getting things wrong, but it is a basis, along with Jesus, for understanding grace. Tolerance is not a word I hear often in the church these days, and yet is a crucial aspect of grace. When we learn to become more tolerant of each other we will see our communities transformed.

To milk the swimming pool metaphor for all its worth, we are all trying to swim, each in our own style, and at our own pace. Living in community means choosing to look out for and love my fellow swimmers, no matter how different their stroke is to mine. If someone swims into my lane and cuts across my path I may swallow a little water, but I will never drown while I follow the example of God, who swims beside us always.

When I choose to move past 'me', to focus on God and love my community, I can show this world the gift of grace instead of the curse of a claim to something the world can neither give, nor do I deserve. As a follower of Jesus, I cannot subscribe to the 'Where there's blame there's a claim' mentality, since, because of Jesus, I am compelled to dive into the deep end and, through him, learn how to swim with others. For grace is never claimed: it is given.